Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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