Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize