It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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