so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
