You took a bar mat shot.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize