Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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