Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize