I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize