I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
