so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
