You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
