I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize