I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
