How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
