Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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