I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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