So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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