The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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