I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
