That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
