Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize