smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I AM VODKA MAN
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
