i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
