Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
So many bounce houses so little time
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
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