the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize