Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(613): View more from Ontario

You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..

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(203): View more from Connecticut

If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?

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(605): View more from South Dakota

This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.

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(775): View more from Nevada

Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.

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(204): View more from Manitoba

That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.

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