Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
