Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
