Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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