do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
