his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
