I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
