Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize