found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
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