What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
