No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
