Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
