i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
