I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
