Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
