I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
