When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
