shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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