Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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