I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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