how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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