well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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