We won't sleep together?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
He passed out mid-signature
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
