So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
