very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
