I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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